Masculine and feminine energy
Regardless of where we fall on the gender spectrum, we all have masculine and feminine energy. How we use and manage these energies plays an important part of being an empowered adult and creating a sustainable future.
Just to be really clear, I am not talking about gender or sex. Lets move away from the social constructs and stereotypes of femininity or masculinity. Lets look instead at masculine and feminine as energies and how balancing them and using them on purpose leads to an outcome greater than the sum of its parts.
If the goal is to be empowered, understanding these nuances, and opening up how we think about gender and gendered thinking is crucial.
Once we become aware of and acknowledge that all of us have these different energies. Once we become aware of their polarity and their inherent yet diverse gifts, we can recognise them in ourselves and in each other, and learn how to appreciate and harness them for ourselves and in relationship with each other.
The first step in doing this is to stop thinking of them as masculine and feminine.
Take away the learned meaning society may have given or associated with these words and come at it from a different angle.
What happens if instead of male and female, you think of warrior and healer instead?
Or yang and yin?
Or moon and sun?
Or give and receive?
Regardless of whether masculine or feminine energy comes more naturally to you, its suddenly much clearer that we need both equally, right?
In fact we can’t have one without the other to support it, contain it or fill it….
Needing something equally makes it of equal importance.
And they are, they’re equal but different, because it wouldn’t work if both parts were the same. We need both parts to polarise and create the energy needed to grow and change.
For however long ‘The Patriarchy’ has been running the show, the masculine has been revered while the feminine devalued. The balance however is shifting, and it is vital for our survival, growth and prosperity that we all activate and use both in balance to create harmony.
Balancing our energies will look different for everyone.
As individuals we are complex and unique, therefore we do not always need things ‘balanced’ by having the same amount of each, in fact sometimes in order to balance or harmonize we often need a lot more of one, in order to actually balance out the other.
For most of our lifetime we have all focused on, and been rewarded for developing and accentuating our more masculine traits;
DO, ACT, TAKE, CONTAIN, GIVE
It makes sense then that in order to balance these energies within ourselves, and in society we ALL might need more of the ‘feminine,’ at this time.
Right now, because of circumstance and history, regardless of gender we might be less practiced and less comfortable with;
BE, DIRECT, ALLOW, FILL, RECEIVE
Balancing then is actually about harmonising.
Creating harmony, is really about becoming aware, understanding and appreciating what each side brings, being respectful of the needs and desires of each, as well as appreciating what each does for the other and balancing with discernment in line with the requirements of the situation.
What this really means is that there is no prescription I can give you for when to DO or when to BE.
No right way to give or receive.
No set rules for giving and receiving – EXCEPT that we must listen to our own internal feminine energy by tuning into our intuition, listening and then using our masculine energy to take action on what we hear.
I am not talking at this point at about masculine and feminine energy in relationship between two people, but about the two energies that we all have inside ourselves.
That said, can you see the potential magnetising, harmonising or polarising relationship between these masculine and feminine energies?
Notice, where do they show up in your life?
The feminine DIRECTS, the masculine ACTS.
The feminine is Shakti, the masculine; Shiva.
The feminine is yin, the masculine is yang.
The feminine the moon and the masculine the sun.
The feminine is ‘being’ and masculine is ‘doing’.
How and why would I want to balance masculine and feminine energy?
The masculine is here to keep us safe and create a container.
Having a strong masculine energy is necessary for survival. Traits such as logic, planning, and structure fall under the masculine. Ways of being such as fortitude, discipline, and control are your masculine energy.
Having a healthy masculine energy supports the growth of a balanced ego, enables financial stability, provides for your family, and ensures shelter.
The masculine in us is ‘presence seeking freedom’.
The feminine is here to desire, create and receive.
Having a strong feminine energy is necessary for expansion, and growth.
The feminine part of ourselves is often devalued and therefore less developed in a society led by The Patriarchy (highly ego driven.)
Feminine energy shows up as intuition, receptivity, emotion and creative vision.
The feminine in us is ‘freedom seeking presence.’
Not only is our feminine energy necessary to counterbalance the masculine, it is also necessary to fuel our growth and expansion and allow us to be fully expressed.
Having a healthy feminine energy nurtures us, fuels us and allows us to innovate.
When we operate primarily from our masculine side, we may feel tired, stressed, overworked or unloved. We feel overworked, and we move about life on autopilot, too much in our heads and not enough in our bodies.
We may feel separate and experience a lack of intimacy in our lives, if you feel this way, it is likely that a re-fuel of the feminine is in order.
When we operate primarily from our feminine side we may feel like we are not moving forward, that our ideas lack substance, and we may seek external validation and approval as a result. We may find ourselves in co-dependent relationships and unable to know our own mind.
When we are using our masculine and feminine energy in balance or harmony we’ll find ourselves interdependent, with a sense of true belonging, confidence and sovereignty.
We’ll have ideas, and bring them to fruition. Work with our cycles, take care of ourselves and each other, be radically responsible and wonderfully wild in equal measure.
Here are THREE things you can do to activate your feminine energies
Explore your creativity.
Paint – get yourself some watercolours, and just play with the colours for fun.
Sculpt something; remember clay, plasticine or even papier mache?
Arrange a bouquet of flowers or maybe try Making some paper flowers
Explore your sensuality.
Do you even know how you like to be touched?
What smells do you love? What are your favourite foods? Are there fruits you’ve always longed to try? Go out in nature and look at its beauty! Listen to music that makes your heart sing!
Explore with curiosity what excites all of your senses.
Slow down and feel it all.
Explore your ‘woo woo’ side.
Get a tarot or oracle card deck and try your hand, burn some sage, create sacred space, create a ritual, or try a numerology reading. Go to a metaphysical store and have some reiki, get your astrological chart read or hang out with some crystals.
Here are THREE things you can do to activate your masculine energies
Get clear on and sort out your finances.
Stop burying your head in the sand. Empower yourself by actually checking your bank balances. Make a budget or a plan. Set up a system, create new accounts to save or organise your cash with Plum, Tide or Monzo.
Set up a schedule or routine that allows you to contain each of your tasks. As a bonus, set up a system that allows you to remove your to-do list from you head, onto somewhere you can let go of ‘holding it’. Check out Harness your Hustle with Amy Mitchell.
Take repeated and consistent action.
Try stuff out without fear of failure, you only fail if you stop or give up, until then, its just practising or having another go. Be patiently impatient, practice honing your focus and conviction, go for your target like a hunter with a bow and arrow.